This evening, I had the blessing of attending my cousin’s wedding. It was a reminder of God’s faithfulness to provide companionship for his children. It was also a joy to be a part of such a happy day for a dear friend and relative (who is also my brother in Christ).
As my family left the church and headed for the reception, I began to reflect on what had just taken place inside. While this wedding was breathtaking, some elements were clearly unorthodox. I weighed each part in my mind, evaluating it based on my past experiences of matrimonial ceremony. I determined that every part, even ones I didn’t fully appreciate or understand, expressed the unique personalities of the bride and groom. They weren’t just being unorthodox, they were making it personal…and I was honored to be able to celebrate their wedding their way.
It’s important to be careful about how particular we think about what should and should not happen at a wedding. The Bible has virtually nothing to say about weddings. One of the few verses that even comes close is Hebrews 13:4, “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” Note that the passage doesn’t even say “weddings”, it simply says “marriage” is to be held in honor among all. There isn’t any set standard of dos and don’ts when we talk about weddings. You can make it exactly how you like it… as long as it’s not too long!
I think the most important detail a wedding should have is to place a high priority on the meaning of marriage. So when their pastor took time to focus on this passage from Ephesians, it showed me that he and both my cousin and his wife sought to honor marriage through their wedding. All the glitz and glamor is well and good, but in order for it to be meaningful and lasting, a wedding must reflect the values of our Creator as we seek to abide joyously in the relationship he designed.
Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
Ephesians 5:22-33
